


I found her

by camimendes



Category: Krashlyn - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-06-05
Packaged: 2018-05-29 18:07:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6387100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/camimendes/pseuds/camimendes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alexandra Krieger and Ashlyn Harris have been together for 12 years. Things have been rough along the way, as no relationship is perfect. They fell out of love for almost a year, but got back together and married 3 years after that. Talks of babies and puppies have been on the rise in the current years, especially since the couple is aging, though the only thing they have gone through with was getting a dog several years ago.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Camp begins

After retiring from national team stardom, the famous couple known as “Krashlyn” decided to open a soccer clinic for the first time. The clinic was taking place during a scolding hot summer in no other state but Florida. They hosted little girls from ages six to twelve divided into a few groups depending on skill and age. Ashlyn was going to take care of the older kids, while Ali was going to take on the younger ones. It was their first time doing it and they had quite a few kids signed up.

“Ash, love, we have 40 kids in this camp” Ali told her as she put down her coffee and pushed back her hair, a little concerned.

Ashlyn giggled and walked over to Ali. “Ali, you’re the one that came up with this brilliant idea. We didn’t have kids, although we are still fertile (she stressed), these are now going to be your little munchkins!” This made Ali smile and she replied, “We’ll have kids” 

“Yeaaaah, okay, princess, okay” Ashlyn says sarcastically as she closes the fridge door.

Ali plays with her wedding ring and smiles, looking down at it.

“We’ve been through so many rough patches, Ash. I can’t believe we’ve made it through” She finishes her sentence before she looks up. 

The blonde wife looks straight at her love and smiles. “Okay, stop being gushy, I will cry. You know I have a weak spot.”

Ali replies with a genuine smile and gets up.

“What time’s the camp at?” 

“Uh, it starts at 1. So after lunch.” Ash gets the clinic booklet to make sure what she’s saying is right. She sees 1PM and nods in agreeance.

The camp would take place every weekday from 1PM to 4PM for 3 weeks. It was a fifteen-day camp that every American soccer daughter wanted to attend. Children travelled across the States to attend and crammed in hotel rooms to save the price. It was a once in a lifetime opportunity they thought, unless Ali and Ashlyn decided to host again.

After a few hours of preparation, the two pack their cars with net bags full of soccer balls and extra soccer equipment. 

"Did you get the extra shin guards?" Ali checks with Ashlyn. Ali nods a yes and they both get into the car. 

Ashlyn is the one driving, as Florida is her home state and she knows her way around. Ali runs her hand along her wife's thigh and feels her stomach knot. She wants to make love with Ashlyn but she knows she can't. 

"Alex, babe. Just think of the kids faces if they just caught you with your hand there" Ali whips her hand away. "Okay, whoa! No no no" Ali shakes her head. 

Ashlyn laughs and smiles at her girl. Ali always manages to put a smile on her wife's face. It's hard for Ashlyn to take her eyes off of Ali, though she knows she has to concentrate on driving. 

"Kay, 2 minutes and we should be arriving at the pitch" Ashlyn informs Ali. 

"Oh, yeah okay. I see it coming up" Ali confirms. "This is gonna be so fun. Like I can't wait to be with all those little cuties playing our game" Ali feels all gushy and excited and smiles wide. Her contagious smile causes Ash to smile too. Ashlyn parks the car in the lot, where some cars are already parked. Children are playing outside, slowly getting to know each other. Some of the parents are standing around, though it looks like little girls are outnumbering parents. 

The couple shares a quick kiss in the car and get out, getting the equipment. They drag their things to the pitch and greet the girls with smiles and waves. It's a quarter to 1 and most of the kids are arriving by now. 

Ashlyn goes up to the kids and parents and shouts out. "Whenever you guys are ready, we are! Make sure to bring your bags to the benches and have your cleats on!" She winks and runs back to the field. 

The nervous little girls drag their big bags towards the benches and kiss their moms and dads goodbye for the next few hours. 

The girls gather around and sit in a semi-circle shape. 

"Hi girls! I'm Ali, as you know. This is Ashlyn. "Ali points her hand out to Ash and they both smile. 

"Who is under 9 years old? I've got my list, but I want to meet you all!" Ali asks joyfully. 

"Whoever is 10 and older, join me in this circle!" Ashlyn walks over to the far right. 

The girls split up and form 2 semi equal groups. There are a few more girls in the older group, though not significantly higher. 

"Okay, so, I'll call out your names. Raise your hand when you're called and I want you to tell your group how old you are and one very special fact. We won't only work on your soccer talent, but your friendships, too!" The little girls all look at each other with smiles and with blank faces. 

"Emily?" 

"Here! I'm 7, and I like to play Volleyball sometimes." "Thank you, Emily!"

"Maria?"

"I'm Maria, I'm 8 and I speak 6 languages." "Very cool, Maria. Thank you!"

"Morgan?" 

No response. A slight hand was raised with a head looking down. When little Morgan raised her head, her eyes seemed red, as if she had just cried herself to camp. "I'm here. I'm 9" Morgan let out quietly. 

"Would you like to share anything else, Morgan?" Asked coach Ali. 

Morgan shook her head no. "Okay, Morgan, it's nice to meet you!" Ali tried her best not to embarrass the young girl in front of the group and tried to make her smile as much as she could, though she did not seem to have much luck. 

Over at Ashlyn's group, they were already playing an active game involving soccer skills and meeting each other at the same time. Ashlyn made them pass the ball to anyone and whoever they had passed to, had to say their name and a fact. 

An hour has gone by and both coaches set up skill games. They met up in the middle and started talking. "Sooo any stars, Ash?" "I've spotted a few but I'm treated them all fairly! No self-fulfilling prophecies in my class!" She gives Ali a wink and a small nudge. "Hey! I never asked you to favor one" Ali gave Ashlyn the silly stink eye. "There's a little one in my group, Morgan, she doesn't seem so thrilled to be here, but I mean, she's kind of gotten the hang of it." Ali looks over to her group and looks for Morgan. 

"Which one is she?" Ashlyn asks. 

"Uh... Okay, hold on" Ali runs off and meets her group. 

"Hey girls, time out! Has anyone seen Morgan?" Ali asks, stressfully. 

"Which one is Morgan?" Samantha asks. 

"The crybaby" A 9 year old Jenny calls out. 

"Hey! No, no name calling. Everyone reacts differently in every situation. We will respect one another" Ali rubs Jenny's arm, somehow consoling her, though she should be consoling the one in distress, Morgan. 

"I think she went to the bathroom" Emily says and Ali begins jogging to the main building. 

"Morgan?" She yells out as she gets closer to the building. 

"Morgan, hun? You in here?" Ali is about to panic. It's the first day and she's losing kids. 

"Here." A little voice says coming from a stall in the bathroom. Her purple cleats are dangling from underneath and Ali leans on the door. "You have to ask me if you want to go to the bathroom, Morgan. Okay?" "Ok, I'm sorry" Morgan apologizes. 

"It's okay." Ali tries to calm herself. The door to the stall opens and Ali almost stumbles, not realizing the door was going to open any time soon. Morgan's face was wet. "What's the matter, love?" Morgan shrugs her shoulders and begins walking to the sink to wash her face with water. Ali gets a sudden flashback of herself as a young girl washing her face at the sink at soccer camp. A girl had pushed her and told her she wasn't good enough. Morgan's shoulder length brown hair resembled Ali's as a child. Ali realized how she felt in that moment. She did not want to talk to anyone and she let Morgan breathe a little. 

"I won't pressure you, but if you need to talk, talk to me"


	2. She notices

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter, but a very important one.

Monday night, the first night of camp, the loving couple return to their comfy abode on the shore of the Florida coast. The first three hours of camp were tiring for not only the children, but also for the two coaches. 

"Alex, babe, you think you'll have enough energy for 3 weeks of this?" Ashlyn asks, giggling as they approach the driveway. Ali is staring outside the window strangely and it takes her a good moment to reply. "Oh, yeah" Ali's reply was not very motivating, but Ashlyn shrugged away the oddity and pulled into the driveway. She pulled up the handbreak on their black jeep and they both got out. 

Ali's focus was no where near her usual: Ashlyn. She seemed loss and out of focus. She was living inside her memory for the evening and it was hard to snap her out of it.

Ashlyn walked to the trunk of the vehicle and got their purses out. "I guess we'll leave the ball bags here, they'll be in there for the next 3 weeks, hm?" Ali nodded a poker-faced yes. Ashlyn proceeded by hanging Ali her purse, though Ali dropped it because she did not even catch it in the first place. "Al! Snap out of it. You tired?" Ashlyn snapped her fingers in Ali's face with exaggeration and Ali stuck out her tongue, a typical princess response. She then nodded no to the being tired question and they walked to the front door.

Ashlyn unlocked it and they both walked in.

"I'm gonna.. go to take a bath, okay?" Ali stated more than asked her blonde wife. Ashlyn stopped Ali in her tracks and grabbed her arm. "Babe, what's the matter? It's only 5:30, we're gonna eat dinner soon."

"I'm tired" Ali stated. "Two minutes ago, you said you weren't. Stop with the lies, princess. What is it?" Ashlyn practically begs. She doesn't like when Ali hides anything or is in distress. She loves her and her care for her is immense.

"I changed my mind. I really need to rest, okay?" Ali sets herself free of Ashlyn's light grip and practically runs up the stairs. She slams the door to the bathroom closed and leans against it. The tears start to flow. She doesn't know herself why she's crying but the ideas in her head somehow won't escape.

She runs the water and strips down to nothing. Everything is silent and she slowly steps in, right leg first. She sits herself down and closes her eyes. They're already swollen from crying for only a few minutes but crying irritates her eyes.

Downstairs, Ashlyn prepares a fresh salad with a side of fries because she knows that her wife would appreciate some comfort food even if she doesn't understand what's going on.

Ashlyn herself can't push the worry for Ali out of her mind and she almost chops her finger off, literally. She swears to herself and continues shopping the salad.

Upstairs, Ali tries to concentrate on her breathing but finds it very difficult, considering the situation. But what _is_ the situation?

Ali thinks to herself. _She can't be mine. I mean, I just met her. But a mother's instinct, right? Right._ She doesn't want Morgan to be her given-up daughter, but she also does at the same time. Ali had gotten pregnant after leaving Ashlyn. It was a mistake she had made and she learnt damn well from it. After a long night out with new people, she found herself in the bed of a man whom she had barely known. Sure, he was attractive, but not enough to create a unity between them. Weeks later, Ali found herself pregnant with a child and life went downhill from there. She become severely depressed to the point of illness. You'd think she would lose her child, but she didn't. She sometimes prayed that she would have, but the superior force somehow wanted her to be stuck with a baby.

So, for weeks of hiding out and being hospitalized, she kept that baby inside. She gave birth 9 months later and immediately gave her baby girl up for adoption. This was a secret she'd kept from Ashlyn and she was very well stressed that it would someday creep out and it seemed like that thought would soon be coming into reality.

 


	3. Confirmed

The morning after the first day of the couple's soccer clinic, Ali woke up with a throbbing headache. She'd been up through the night massaging her temples and Ashlyn would wake up with her and rub her forehead. Any bit of light shining through the curtains from headlights had Ali forcing her eyes shut. Whenever the brunette cried, she got migraines, _really_ bad migraines. At 7 o'clock, Ali forced herself to sit up. The movement awoke her blonde wife and she quickly sat up to hold Ali and rub her back.

"Are you doing okay?" Ashlyn asked with concern. 

Ali shut her eyes and tears started to stream down her face. She thought she had been done with the crying, but her mind still hadn't forgotten Morgan.

Ashlyn gently wiped her tears away with her soft thumb and kissed Ali's temple. "Tell me" 

Ashlyn knew it was difficult to get Ali to talk about her feelings but she insisted on always trying. She knew how it felt to keep dark thoughts inside and how they could destroy a person so she always offered her ears to her wife, in case she ever did need to open up.

Ali shaked her head no slowly. "We don't have to go to camp today. It's raining anyways. I can e-mail the parents and let them know it's been cancelled." Ashlyn started to reach for her cell phone to began an e-mail, but Ali grabbed the blonde's arm to stop her. "No?" Asked Ashlyn.

The brunette shook her head no. She wanted to stand up, so she moved her legs to the side of the bed and leaned on the edge. A few seconds later, she pushed herself up and told Ash "I'm really sorry. You've never really experienced me this way and it must suck" Ashlyn rushed over to her wife's side and rubbed her arms. "Look at me, Alex" Ashlyn stated. Ali looked up at her wife's brown eyes. "I've been through many rough patches, babe. I know how it feels and I would never get mad at you for this. You don't have to hide with me. I get it" She was very supportive of Ali and she always wanted to make sure she knew that.

As Ali nodded in agreeance, she she still had the thought of her biggest secret in the back of her mind. Even though she may be overthinking it, she was sure Morgan was hers. She was practically a replica of a little Alexandra Blaire Krieger. Morgan had short dark brown hair with piercing brown eyes and a beautiful smile. Age nine was the age Ali would begin her soccer star career and she couldn't wait to see what skills little Krieger had to show.

"Thanks, Ash. Really" Ali was grateful for her wife. She did a lot for her and even in that year off, she regretted every mistake she had made. A year apart taught them both that they were soulmates and that there was no other option. They were to be together. Ash nodded a yes and smiled at her.

"You know what? I'm gonna take a shower, Ash. Get me a bagel in the toaster?" Ash couldn't help but smile. She was still that princess she'd been for the many years they've been together.

"Such a princess" She kissed Ali's lips softly and this had Ali smiling. That was a good sign.

* * *

 

As they arrived to the pitch, Ali's heart was beating faster than usual. Seeing little Morgan was nervewracking to her. Her palms began to sweat and she was curious as to which little girls had been at the pitch already, so she was looking out the window trying to see everything.

"Someone's excited. Who you looking for, Al?" Ash asked. She wasn't looking at Ali, but saw her curiosity out of the corner of her eye. She pulled into a parking spot.

"Oh, no, no one. I just wanna see the field conditions" Ali was straight up lying and Ashlyn could easily tell by her actions and tone of voice.

"You cheating on me with a soccer momma?!" Ash joked.

Ali punched her arm and yelled "No!" while Ash pretended to be wincing in pain.

"Oh quit your shit, Ash. I barely touched you!" Ali had a serious look on her face as if she was literally annoyed with Ashlyn's joke. So Ashlyn quit joking around and brushed it off.

Her nerves were getting to her and she was quite bad at hiding them.

As they left the car, they both walked up to their teams waiting in a circle, talking.

"Making friends? Good girls!" Ashlyn encouraged the two teams. "Babe, I know something's up but you gotta be good for the kids, okay?" Ashlyn warned Ali. Ali nodded in agreeance and faked her way through training.

Ali tried to avoid her focus on Morgan as much as possible and made sure her attention was getting the whole team. This was difficult for Ali. She had her eyes glancing back at the nine year old, who was actually very good at the sport and smiled just like Ali.

At one point during the game, Morgan came up to her coach. "Coach Ali, thank you for talking to me last time. My mommy said you can come to our house for supper. She said you're a nice coach" Morgan offered. Ali didn't want to look into the young girl's eyes but came down to them a moment later. 

"Did she? So sweet. I'll have to talk to coach Ashlyn about it. Is it okay if we both come?" She asked Morgan.

"Okay. My mom's name is Montana and she says hi." This hit Ali like a knife. This was the moment she knew. _Why would Montana send Ali's biological child to her soccer camp? To have Ali adopt motherly feelings for her own daughter? How cruel was that and what did she do to deserve this?_

"Well, say hi to mom for me, okay sweetheart?" Crap, she had already adopted those feelings because she wouldn't dare call any other child sweetheart at the camp, no way.

Morgan nodded and ran back to her team.


	4. Tension arises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey readers! I'm so sorry for the long wait; I was working on my finals for the past few weeks. School's over now, so more chapters to come!

Later that night, Ali was rushing through her files from the hospital 9 years ago. She had given birth in Virginia, where Ali was from. This also made the biological mom wonder why Montana moved her family down to Florida, where Ali had moved for Ashlyn. Numerous questions engulfed her mind as she was rummaging through the files. She came across some pink sheets, with birth confirmations and adoption contracts.

"Got them" She mumbled to herself and sat back, taking a deep breath. She was cross-legged on the floor in their office with papers covering the majority of the dark wooden floor.

She knew Ashlyn wasn't home, busy doing groceries, so Ali could take her time. She began reading the sheets. The purpose was to confirm her worst nightmare: her biological daughter taking part in her soccer clinic.

_Montana Tommison... Jake Thomas... June 3rd, 2016... Adoption of female... brown eyes... brown hair... 20 inches long... weighing 7 pounds, 2 ounces... Morgan..._

The words almost cut Ali's heart and mind into a billion little pieces. This information she wished would be confirmed wrong was actually right. She knew it. Her own child, whom she'd thought she would never see again, is now attending her soccer clinic for 3 weeks. The tears rolled down her cheeks and she brought her knees up to her chest. She wasn't sure why this hurt so bad. She was confused. Though she realized she was hurt because she really did not want to see her baby girl that she'd given up on the day she was born.

The door to their home creaked open as it always did and Ashlyn put the bags down onto the floor. Ali quickly wiped her face and stuffed all the sheets back into the suitcase and slid it under the bookshelf, where it had been hidden all along. Although it was technically in plain sight, Ashlyn never even imagined to look for such documents.

"I'm home, chicka!" Ash yells up to Ali. Ali gets up off the floor and walks downstairs, faking a smile.

"Hey, sexy. You get anything good?

"Yeah, some bananas. You know.. to make you feel good.." Ash smirked as she began picking up the bags again to bring them into the kitchen.

Ali gave her the stink eye and pushed her gently. "As if your tongue isn't enough" She winked.

They both brought the bags into the white-polished kitchen and set them down onto the island.

Ali helped her wife put the food away and they exchanged a few cute pecks as they did so.

"You are beautiful, Al" Ashlyn kissed Ali's nose and pulled her in for a hug. 

Ali backed up on the island and sat up, Ashlyn standing between her dangling legs. 

The blonde, horny wife "accidentally" placed a hand over the crotch of Ali's jeans and smirked. "Wooooops" was let out with exaggeration.

Ali grabbed her wife's boobs with both hands unexpectedly and they both laughed. 

As they calmed down with their laughter, Ali began to subtly grind on the hand that was placed between her legs. Her actions were barely subtle to Ashlyn, who was pressing her hand harder against her wife's jeans. Even though jeans were thicker than nothing at all, Ali still felt a tiny bit of sensation against her sensitive spot and moaned softly.

"Come on babe" Ash backed up and put her hand out. She dragged Ali to the bedroom and undressed her.

* * *

 

The morning after, the couple found themselves at the pitch a little early and decided to run some laps to get ready for the hyper little ones that were about to show up. After a good dozen laps, the two collapsed onto the grass and sweat was dripping off their faces as the sun shone brightly on their rosy cheeks. Ali rolled over to face Ashlyn and they kissed sweetly. "I love you" Ali had said. This was rare. Although Ashlyn knew Ali loved her, the 3 words barely came from her mouth. She was sensitive with the love talk and Ashlyn understood. However, Ali's actions made up for her words and it didn't really matter how she said or did it, she knew she was loved.

"I love you, too" Ashlyn confirmed.

As they heard a first car pull up, they quickly shot up in seated position and rubbed the grass from their sweaty legs.

"Well, they're coming. Better get up" Ashlyn stated. The wives both got up and Ali rubbed her head and winced as soon as she was up.

"What's the matter, babe?" Ashlyn asked with concern. "Got up too fast" Ali chuckled and Ash rubbed her arm. "Careful, baby"

Of course, the first family there was Morgan, her mom and a young boy, who was probably her brother. Obviously not Ali's child. 

Morgan met eyes with her coach Ali and ran over, holding her bag and cleats. "Hi Coach! I brought my brother, can he stay and watch today? My mom has to go somewhere!" The young one barely made it to Ali, her belongings were falling out and she kept having to pick them up. Morgan seemed very excited and could hardly even get the words out. 

"Slow down, Morgan. Yes, brother can stay. What's his name?" Ali laughed.

"Mikey! well Michael, but Mikey and he's 7!" She finally reached Ali and hugged her, something Ali did not necessarily want but accepted. The smell on the little girl reminded Ali of her childhood. Even though she smelled like fresh laundry, she also had that scent, that Krieger scent. 

Ashlyn observed the two and smiled. She knew Ali was going to be a great mom and she so badly wanted children with her.

Mikey followed slowly, shoelaces untied. He had lighter hair than his sister's and glasses. Of course, he did not look anything like Morgan, since he wasn't her real sister. He was a little skinny and had a darker skin tone.

Montana was walking over and unexpectedly called Ali to the side. Ali's heart began to race and she jogged over. 

Montana stared Ali down for a few seconds and finally spoke. She didn't look Ali straight in the eye, but they both knew. "Look, we both know-" But suddenly, Montana was cut off by Ali. "We both know that this is the worst karma I can receive. Why are you doing this?" Ali was shocked by her own words and quickly covered her mouth, reflexively.

"Listen, I get it. But she saw your ad in the newspaper and she really wanted to be here. I tried to make up excuses. It wasn't my push, it was my child's. Can we put this behind us and just let her have fun?" Montana pleaded.

Two statements in that hurt Ali. The first was "my child" and the second being "can we put this behind us?", as if this was a regular, pushover situation. 

"I've been trying to push this away but it's a little impossible" Ali let out a nervous, anger filled laugh.

Ashlyn was eyeing them from afar and started to wonder. Little Morgan was really glued to Ali recently and this little meeting caught her attention. Was Ali cheating? This was the only thought that entered Ashlyn's mind and she did not like it. Was this the soccer momma joke that turned into reality? 

"Just, please. Take care of her" Montana began to turn away to her car.

"Oh, I will" Ali smirked with anger.


	5. Cheating?

After camp that day, the couple cleaned up the pitch and put stuff into their car. Tension was high on both ends, but for different reasons. Ashlyn suspected her wife cheating on her, though Ali certainly was not. Ali couldn't get her mind off of Montana's hurtful words. The two clashed with every movement and short statement that came from their mouths. Ali accidentally bumped back into Ashlyn as she was trying to push a camping chair into the tight bag.

Ashlyn let out an annoyed sigh and Ali turned around. "Babe, what's the matter? Were the girls bad to you?" Ali asked, trying to push her own thoughts away. 

"No, just, whatever" The blonde walked away with a bag of soccer balls over her shoulder.

Ali stood there, a little confused and ran over to Ashlyn. "Babe, talk to me." "No, like, i'm fine, just tired" Ashlyn lied. 

It seemed at this point that many feelings were being kept secret, though it never used to be that way. They felt as though they needed to be perfect for each other, which was humanly impossible.

They both got into the jeep and Ali drove this time. Ashlyn always offered to have Ali rest but Ali took the wheel, having Ashlyn rest.

"Do you wanna grab some dinner or something, Ash?" Ali offered.

"Nah, there's some salad and chicken in the fridge. We'll make do" Ashlyn replied, not looking out the window. The tension was high and quite uncomfortable.

"I don't mind stopping at Publix. We have time" Ali tried to ease up the tension, but was failing miserably. Ashlyn just shook her head no and Ali agreed, shrugging her shoulders and headed straight home. 

 

* * *

 

"Mama? Why did you talk to Coach Ali?" Morgan asked her mom.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing" 

"I really like her! She helps me a lot." Morgan smiled big, remembering her time in the bathroom with her coach, Ali.

"Oh really? How so?" 

Morgan did not want to admit she cried to Ali the first day, so she lied to her mom.

"Oh, well with the soccer stuff, mommy" Montana smiled in the rearview mirror.

"I'm so so so happy to meet soccer players like that! Mommy, did you know Ali won a world cup? I want to win a world cup!" Morgan looked at her mom in the front seat and she smiled with excitement.

"Yes, I know, I'm glad you like it, sweetie" Montana faked a smile. She began to think this was a mistake.

* * *

 

Later that night in bed, the pressure was high. Ali wanted to make Ashlyn feel better, but it was difficult. When Ashlyn was in a mood, her mindset was fixed and any attempt to change it would be noticed by Ashlyn and she fought to stay in that mood. 

Ashlyn was already in bed and Ali slid herself under the sheets. Wearing only a tanktop and short shorts, she may have thought Ashlyn would forget her mindset and turn to sex, but that wasn't so smart.

"Seriously? As if she's not enough?" Ashlyn let out a snarky comment and Ali barely heard her while she ruffled the sheets.

"Huh?" She questioned.

"Nevermind" Ashlyn was referring to Montana, but Ali did not catch onto anything. 

The brunette tried to lean up against Ashlyn, as they usually did at night but Ashlyn did not budge. She actually got quite annoyed and leaned more over.

Ali looked up at her. "Hm?" This was her cuddly way of asking _what's up_ or _what's wrong_ but she shouldn't have done that. Not at this time.

"Nothing" Ashlyn gave her with attitude.

Ali sat up and looked at Ashlyn. "What is the problem? Like, I didn't do anything! You're acting as if I'm the problem here!" 

"Oh? So I am?" Ashlyn began to get up from the bed.

"No! Nobody is the problem!" Ali cried out.

"I'm just gonna go for a walk." Ashlyn got up from the bed and viciously grabbed a light coat.

"You're not going anywhere." The older wife grabbed the blonde and pulled her back down to bed.

"Explain. This is really getting to you and I will not let whatever the problem is eat you alive!" Ali was growing concerned with every passing second and she looked straight into Ashlyn's eyes when there seemed to be a year long pause, though was only a few seconds.

"You really don't know? You're seeing another woman. After all these years! Like how could you?" Ashlyn was getting teary-eyed and looked back into Ali's eyes. There was a lot of love, though hatred was rising from Ashlyn.

"What are you even talking about?" Ali was sincerely confused and gave her that look. The look of hella confusion. "Do you seriously think I'd cheat on you? With who? Myself?" Ali let out a ridiculed laugh.

"No! That mom. What's her name? Uh" Ashlyn was searching for words. Her mind was not focused on talking. Her amygdala ( _ ~~emotional center of the brain~~_ ) was working way too strongly, taking over her speech centers. 

"Montana?" Ali suggested. Ashlyn nodded furiously and looked down to the side.

"That one! Like, is she that hot? I don't even see it" Ashlyn was so angry but Ali cracked a smile. She couldn't help it. Since Ashlyn would be relieved knowing that Ali was not seeing Montana, it was okay to joke, or so she thought.

"This is not funny, Ali" But Ali only began to laugh at this point. "Babe, I am not seeing her! She just.. wants to talk about Morgan's progression" This was certainly a lie, but it was better than telling Ashlyn the complete truth. Well, at least she wasn't cheating.

"Really?" Ashlyn looked up at her wife.

"Really." Ali pulled Ashlyn in to hold her. "I would never ever do that to my angel" She placed a kiss on Ashlyn's temple and smiled. Ashlyn smiled slightly and felt a sense of relief.

"I'm sorry. I'm just -" Ali cut her off. "Overprotective and loving" Ali finished her sentence. "And that's okay"

Ashlyn shrugged her shoulders. "It is, I promise" The older of the two reassured her.

"But, I do have something to tell you" With this, Ashlyn looked up, concerned.


	6. Bravery

"Ali baby what is it?" Ashlyn asks concerned as she rests her hand on the brunette's shoulder. She then raises her hand to Ali's hair and strokes it softly. "You know I love you and I know something's been up"

"I know I'm bad at hiding my feelings. I'm so sorry" Ali looks up towards her wife and gives her an uneasy look.

Ashlyn grabs her in for a hug and rides her arm. "I promise, it's okay"

With Ashlyn's reassurance, Ali takes a deep breath and begins.

"Morgan, from camp. She's not Montana's child" She stops.

"Okay? So?" Ashlyn lets out a ridiculed laugh. She's tired of hearing the name Montana.

"She's mine"

Ashlyn's jaw drops. She's so short of words and Ali can't even find her own words to begin to explain.

A literal minute of silence occurs before any of the two speak.

Finally, Ashlyn speaks. She's in disbelief. "But, when? I've been with you for forever. I mean we only had a year -" And with this, her own words are cut. "Oh, right, the year off." She corrects herself.

Ali begins to explain before the blonde wife can speak any further. "During that year, I did stupid things. The breakup was so hard on me. And the first few weeks, I spent a lot of time fooling around. Like, I didn't even want to live. I'd just get drunk and then end up in bed with some man. I only realized these actions in the morning, after 3 Plan B pills, 1 of which did not work.." She adds "obviously" in a trailed off voice. 

"But Alexandra" Full names were never good.

"Why didn't you tell me? I would have forgotten our differences and helped you. You know how much I want a baby with you" Ashlyn sounds heartbroken. Her arm slowly drifts away from the older woman and she looks at her in disbelief.

"I didn't want to bother you, Ashlyn. Trust me, I've always been wanting to say something! I just felt like I was cheating, even if we weren't together and it's just so complicated. I regret everything" She can't help but start to tear up. This situation breaks her.

"No, no. You live, you don't regret" Ashlyn always came up with mottos.

"But I do, trust me." Ali contradicts her.

"Okay, but all of this aside, why is your daughter at camp? Have we seen her before? Is this the first time she's around?" Ashlyn has so many questions. She wants to know it all and she wants to know it all now.

"Look, I don't even know. I met Montana a few times before and just after the birth, but this is the first time since then. She says Morgan saw an ad for our camp in the paper and she chose this. Apparently Montana wanted to keep her from coming to the camp, but she refused." Ali sighs.

"Right. Well she should have kept her the fuck away" Ashlyn becomes angry.

"Why? I mean yeah, it's unfortunate for me. But why do you care so much?" Again, Ashlyn's jaw drops at this statement.

"Excuse me? Why do I care? Because you're my wife and this all happened between our relationship and yeah, we broke up, but you never told me. It's something super important and I have the right to know, being your wife!" Ashlyn gets up. This isn't good. She lets out a groan.

"I didn't think she'd come back!" Ali starts to fight. She's still sitting on the bed, but she's trying to defend herself.

All Ashlyn can do is shake her head in disbelief.

"I can't deal with this. You should have told me. I feel so... I don't even know" Ashlyn shakes her head some more.

"I'm so sorry, Ashlyn." All Ali can do now is apologize, or try to.

"I need some time. Alone" Ashlyn picks up her keys and starts to head out.

Ali tries to fight it, but she gives up. She's so emotionally drained, she just sits on the bed and cries.

A few moments later, Ashlyn is sitting in their jeep and she thinks. She thinks long and hard before picking up the phone.

She dials the phone. She knows who she's about to call, Alex Morgan.

Alex is her best friend and she knows she can count on her.

A few rings later, Alex picks up. "Ashlyn! Hey!"

"Hey. Listen, we have to talk." 

"Oooh, serious, hm? Never see you that way!" 

"It's really a situation. You mind if I come to your place?" Alex now lives in Florida. She moved there after her career with Orlando Pride and never left.

"Yeah, come on over"

"Ok. Bye" Ashlyn hangs up and starts the engine. 

To get to Alex's place, she has to pass the pitch where Morgan is training with her biological mom, who happens to be her wife, Ali. Ashlyn is tough. She doesn't cry easily but she passes this place and cries.

Minutes later, she reaches Alex's house.

She knocks, doesn't ring. It's an Ashlyn thing.

Alex opens the door with her son, Benjamin in her arms and smiles. "Hey!" Ben is a little one. He's almost 3, but he's a mommy's boy.

Ashlyn barely cracks a smile. "Got the kid, huh?" "Got the kid? Yeah, I'm his mom" Alex slaps Ashlyn's arm for stupidity.

Ashlyn rolls her eyes. They have this kind of relationship.

"Okay but what's up, Ash?" 

"Ali has a kid" 

Alex has the same reaction as Ashlyn. A total jaw drop.

 

 


	7. Sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild trigger warning, nothing that serious because nothing actually happens.

"What the hell do you mean Ali has a kid? Like you got a puppy or what?" Alex can't process the literal meaning of the statement she was just told.

"No, I mean, Ali did the dirty with a man and had a kid" Ashlyn angrily smiled.

"Mama? Auntie Ali play dirty with mud?" Ben asks curiously, while looking up at Alex. Alex shushes him and he giggles. Ben then squirms and Alex puts him down while they all make their way to the living room.

Alex gestures for Ashlyn to sit beside her on the couch.

"Okay, so, when did this happen? I mean, she's been with you for years!" Alex can't believe this.

"Ugh, quite a few years ago, Ali and I split up. We kept it on the downlow because we positively thought it was just a break so we didn't want to shock the world, you know? But it turns out, Ali had a very difficult time with this, which she never even told me. So she went to bars and got drunk and yep, ended up with a kid" Ashlyn looked down and nodded to accept her words.

"Where is the child?" Alex asks in confusion.

"Ha, funny story. Yeah, she's at our clinic" Ashlyn lets out a fake laugh. Alex chews the inside of her cheek. This happens when she's caught in anxiety.

"What the fuck?" "Mama! Bad word!" Ben calls out from the play area in the living room. He's playing with a blue car and driving it up the chair.

"Sorry buddy"

"Let me explain. Ali told me this and I'm not sure where the truth actually lies but this is what I know. Apparently Morgan, the kid, saw an ad in the newspaper for our clinic and really wanted to come. Her mom, who adopted her the day she was born, tried to say no but the kid refused" Ashlyn held up her arms in a what the fuck expression. She thought it was ridiculous that the mother had no control over her 6 year old daughter.

"Wow, this is some messed up story. How is Ali dealing with this?" Alex asks with concern.

"Well I'm not sure how long she's known, but the past few days have been off and I of course noticed from the start of the streak. Honestly though, we haven't spoken much because I sort of... stormed out just now" Ashlyn looked to the side.

"Ash! Babe! This is serious. I know that you're hurt too but Ali is the main victim here, you can't just leave her out in the dark!" Alex slaps Ashlyn's thigh and gets up.

"Go home and talk to her. Please. Then you can come back and we'll talk"

As sincere as Alex was, there was never really a serious moment between the two and Ashlyn let out a giggle. "You're trying to be a grown up but it's just really funny" 

Alex slapped Ashlyn once again. "I'm trying here!"

* * *

 

As Ashlyn pulls up to the front of their Florida home, she takes a deep breath. She needs to prepare herself for what's to come. She puts the Jeep into park in the driveway and sits there for a few minutes. When she finally steps out, she grabs her keys and locks the car.

Ashlyn enters the home and doesn't see Ali. But she hears Ali.

From upstairs, she hears hard wails and screams and immediately panics.

The blonde runs up the stairs, 2 steps at a time and immediately opens the bathroom door. Ali is sitting on the floor screaming.

"Ali! What is happening?" From the looks, there is nothing around Ali but she panics nonetheless. She's afraid her wife might have tried to overdose or cut herself or anything worse.

"Alexandra!"

"What?" Ali cries out. She is barely understandable.

"Tell me what you did! Ali, I'm worried!" Ashlyn sits in front of Ali. She takes her hands and squeezes them.

"Nothing. I'm so sorry" She apologizes.

"No, no, no, no, no. Alexandra, did you hurt yourself?" Ali nods no.

"Okay, thank God." Ashlyn takes a sigh of relief.

The keeper grabs her wife. She begins to cry softly but holds onto the brunette ever so tightly.

"I'm so sorry" Ali apologizes once again. 

Ashlyn backs up and looks at her. "Please, we'll talk about it but I'm okay" 

"No, I'm so sorry" 

"Ali, baby, I forgive you"

Ali gulps and Ashlyn gets up. She fills a cup of tap water and hands it to her wife, still sitting on the floor.

"Come on, let's get you up" She leans down and places her arms under Ali's armpits and lifts her. She is weak, but still standing.

There is a chair in the bathroom and Ashlyn sits on it, pulling her wife onto her lap. Ashlyn wipes her tears and rubs Ali's back to try to calm her down.

"Listen, Ali" She gently brings Ali's head to her chest. Ashlyn's heartbeat always relaxes Ali.

"I'm still beating. I'm beating for you. Now, you keep beating for me" 

"And you know what?" She begins to add. "Morgan is in good hands. She was born at the wrong time, but she's still living her beat. We'll have our own beat, okay?"

Ali nods and Ashlyn rubs her back some more. 

"I love you, Ashlyn" Ali manages to let out.

"I love you too" She reassures her.

* * *

 

Later that night, Ashlyn climbs into bed beside Ali. Ali has been sleeping since the dramatic situation and needed good rest.

"Sweetie, wake up" Ashlyn gently rubs her arms and kisses her cheek.

Ali stirs and opens her eyes slowly. 

"Hey, baby. Good evening" She places a kiss on her nose.

Ali begins to cry. 

"No, no, no!" Ashlyn immediately wipes Ali's tears and tickles her chin to keep her from crying.

Ali gives the blonde puppy eyes and Ashlyn gives her the look.

"I'm okay, trust me. We'll talk when you're ready" She reassures her once again.

"Okay. But Ashlyn" Ali looks at her wife.

"Hm?"

The brunette takes Ashlyn's hand and drags it under the covers and into her shorts.

"Oh boy, someone is..." She turns wide-eyed. "Wet"

"I had a dream... that you... you know" Ali blushes.

"Oh, I know." Ashlyn smirks. "I caught you with your hand in your pants an hour ago" 

Ali's jaw drops. "No way!"

"No, I'm kidding" She laughs. 

"But, I can help you with this"


	8. The talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut warning. Do not read if you can't handle that!

The next morning, Ali wakes up first. She's not sure if she's okay or about to have another breakdown but she feels numb. She feels that she cannot cry anymore and she's a bit relieved of this because she is so tired. She is extremely exhausted and regrets it all.

It is Saturday morning and there is no soccer clinic. Ali has been sitting up in bed for almost a half hour, watching television at a low volume of 3. Suddenly, her blonde wife stirs in the sheets and lets out a deep stretch. 

Ashlyn opens her eyes and sees an awake Ali.

"Good morning, love" She pulls herself up and kisses Ali on the cheek.

"Hi baby" Ali replies, trying to keep herself from breaking down for once.

"At least it's the weekend, no camp, no responsibilities" Ashlyn smirks. 

"You're right, but, um Ash?" She works up her courage. She wants to get this over with and fast.

"Yeah, baby?" Ashlyn listens as she fixes the tangled sheets and blankets.

"I want to talk about the Morgan thing" Ali says back, somewhat coldly.

"Okay, that's fine" To show her full attentiveness, Ashlyn stops what she's doing and gets comfortable. She pulls Ali into her and strokes her hair. "Go for it"

"I don't really know where to start. Is there _she pauses_ you want to know?" Ali doesn't look up at Ashlyn. She's extremely nervous. 

"Al, how did you hide this for so long? Nine months is almost a year and we did meet up a few times during that period. I'm a little lost in this" Ashlyn gives her a confused look.

"Well we met up pretty early in my pregnancy. You know that time you came over and I ran to the bathroom? Told you I had the flu. Not really. Morning sickness. We also met up later along it and my bump was definitely showing then but I wore the loosest shirt ever. I honestly couldn't believe you didn't notice. And I did spend a lot of time away and in the hospital, which you, um, know." Ali isn't sure she should continue.

"Well you tried to kill yourself a few times during this. I knew that. But how did that stress not kill the child?" 

"I honestly can't tell you that but I was surprised myself."

"Ali, I wish I was there" Ashlyn sighs.

"Where?" Ali isn't sure she knows what Ashlyn means.

"When you gave birth. I really want to experience that" Ashlyn pouts, letting out another sigh.

"Trust me, it's really not the most pleasant experience" Ali lets out a laugh.

"It is so beautiful. It's the beginning of a life, Ali! Did you have a C-section? Wait no, your stomach doesn't have scars. Ouch, that must have hurt down there?" Ashlyn giggles and traces a few circles on the brunette's underwear.

Ali slaps Ashlyn's arm playfully. "Yeah, after 8 hours of labor and pushing and pushing and fucking pushing, she finally came out and I swear I was numb down there!" The two both laughed and Ashlyn kissed her wife's cheek.

"But you're doing it again" Ashlyn comments, trying not to laugh.

"Pffft, says who?" Ali questions.

"Your wife! Okay but really, how did you deal with this? I even got back with you not long after you gave up your child and I would have never suspected anything like this" Ashlyn is twirling her own strand of hair; she is curious.

"I barely dealt with it. But I kept reassuring myself that she was a mistake and that she deserved a better home, you know?" Ali nodded, trying to counterfact her actual feelings.

Ashlyn nodded agreeing.

"But is she actually in a better home, Al?" The question was confusing to Ali. She never second guessed Montana. She trusted this woman, even though she was a stranger.

"I mean, yeah" Ashlyn gives her a look. The _really?_ look.

Wide-eyed, the brunette shakes her head exaggeratingly yes and Ashlyn sticks her tongue out at the attitude she's getting.

"Don't have me worry, Ash. Morgan's been living there for her whole nine years of existence." 

"Ok, ok. I'm just looking out for my baby" Ashlyn smiles slightly.

"Your baby, huh?" Ali raises her eyebrow.

"Your baby is my baby" Ashlyn shrugs her shoulders.

A few moments later, the tables are turned. The two went from serious-talk to relieving built up sexual tension. Sex was a fairly frequent activity lately in the Krieger-Harris home and it wasn't even questioned.

"Ashlyn, have you ever fucked a penis?" Ali asks curiously. She's never gotten into straight sex talk with Ashlyn, even after all these years.

The blonde turns red and tries to hide her face by putting it down to the side.

"Awwwww, hunny! Have you?" Ali asks again.

Ashlyn shakes her head no slowly; she's embarrassed at her virginity. 

"Baby, I had no idea!" Ali plays with her wife's hair and kisses her head.

"That explains why I'm still so tight, even after all these years" She giggles, blushing.

"Okay but I love it, so it's all good" The older girl winks.

"But, how is it? You know.. a penis" Ashlyn feels like she's a little girl asking inappropriate questions.

"Well, it's, um, big. It feels like my fingers inside you, except a lot thicker and longer. Almost like that vibrating dildo you can't handle because you're so tight" Ali giggles. Ashlyn gets immediately embarrassed once again and whines. 

"I can too!"

"You cry when it's not even in!"

"Do not!"

"Prove it then" Ali winks and hops off the bed. She reaches into the night table and takes out their infamous toy that is usually used on Ali.

Ashlyn's eyes widen and she bites her lip.

"Come on, show me" Ali begins pulling Ashlyn's boxers down. She knows she won't get away with this.

Once her wife's boxers are pulled off, she immediately brings her dildo towards her entrance. "Okay, whoa! Warm me up first, woman!" Ashlyn gets nervous.

"Stalling, hm? We just had sex a few ago, you're already wet. Nice try" Ali brings the toy towards her entrance again and Ashlyn shuts her eyes.

"Calm down, Ash" Ali rubs her wife's thigh and slowly pushes the fake penis inside of her and of course, Ashlyn winces in pain. "Stop!" Ashlyn cries out.

"Thought so" Ali winks and quickly removes the dildo.

"Oh, whatever, I tried!" Ashlyn sticks out her tongue.

Ali kisses her and they lie in bed for quite a few hours, making out and just plain talking.


End file.
